My thoughts on the victims and Jub Jub

March 9, 2010 § 49 Comments

Yesterday a tragic incident happened. South African hip-hop artist Jub Jub allegedly killed four teenagers due to negligent driving. This was not mere negligent driving, he was drag racing in the middle of a township, in Soweto. Anyone who knows anything about the township is that there are always people walking or trying to cross the street. Always. You can’t drive fast there, let alone race. What makes this incident even worse is the alleged drinking and drug taking.

These six children woke up in the morning to go school, a stepping-stone to futures they had envisioned for themselves. Their parents said goodbye to them in the morning, maybe some didn’t get the chance to because they had already gone to work. No parent wants to bury a child – especially of school going age. The death of a child is not a mere interruption. It is the sudden death of promise.

Many of us are sitting on our high horses judging Jub Jub and his friend. We all have every right to be angered by what happened, angry even at Jub Jub. DH Lawrence said it best when he said, “Anger is just, and pity is just, but judgment is never just.” Four children died an unnecessary death. Four families that should have been making lunch boxes tomorrow are planning lunch for a funeral. People have the right to be angry.

“You do not define anyone with your judgment. You only define yourself as someone who needs to judge.” Wayne Dyer. I am not qualified to pass judgment. What I will state is what I know was wrong, facts. He was wrong to speed. Racing in the middle of the township in the middle of the day with children walking back home from school was irresponsible. All these things while under the influence of alcohol and drugs is insane. That we all agree on. Calling him names now I am not so sure because it could have happened to anyone. I doubt any of us can say Jub Jub and his friend are glad this happened.

Before you judge someone else remember that you too have done something you are ashamed of.

And in all this, let us remember that there are grieving families, our prayers and attention should focus on them instead, not on a celebrity.

This picture for me hurts the most. The bags are so innocuous, yet they tell a story.

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§ 49 Responses to My thoughts on the victims and Jub Jub

  • Shebee says:

    This post made me so sad. I’ve refrained from (much) comment all day because I know this could have happened to anyone. I know all of that, but the fact is, it didn’t have to happen. And that is what I am angry about.

    Look at those shoes. They will never be filled again.

  • Prince Ngwenya says:

    You couldn’t have put this situation any better Khaya, as much as we all speak with anger, we need to understand that the higher being has a plan for everyone – in this case, its sad that so many young lives had to taken in order for one person to realise his mistakes and wrong doings.

    The best we can do with this situation is to just be with every family, whether prayer or in person, just to see them through this rather horrific ordeal. Again, thanx for writing a blog which has been well-thought out.

  • Kennedy says:

    I agree 100% we musnt judge. At the same time its also difficult to comment on the situation without condeming such behaviour as drinking, taking drugs and the race in busy situations. Indeed focus should be more on the grieving families and not the celebrity, but I think what drives name calling from society is the fear that justice will not be found due to Jub Jub’s celebrity status.

  • Buhda says:

    shuuuuuuuuuuuu
    thanks for posting this blog
    ive been wanting since morning to say on facebook, that please stop criticising jub jub. but hey my head would have been cut off.
    but thanks again…

  • Jo Douglas says:

    There is no judgement or consequence as brutal or eternal as the one that Jub Jub will inflict on himself from this day forward, until the day of his own death.

    As humans, we need to show compassion towards those who have lost loved ones – but we also need to show forgiveness to he who caused the loss – for as Khaya says, we have all done things for which we were ashamed.

    The difference may be only that our wrongdoing, or shame, was possibly not so much in the public eye – and we weren’t trialed by a scavenger-style media, hellbent on vengence. It may be that we are the only ones who knows our sin – along with God, who sees all.

    My prayers for those left living – for you will need them most of all.

  • Ntshepeng says:

    The only way for me to not feel what i am feeling right now is for me to forget that i am a parent. I can’t call him names but what happened is beyond comprehension. The more i try to understand how it could have happened, the angrier i get. It’s not even that he was drunk or drugged…it’s that he was drag racing! in broad daylight! ko Soweto…during the week! arghhh, such injustice.

  • Mpho Sempe says:

    I agree we shud be there 4 the families in prayer and i will hav them in my prayers. But let it be noted- Kids dying is in no way God’s plan as was said above by one of the bloggers to teach Jub-jub a lesson. God gives us free will and this is a result of someone’s choice not God’s. All the best to all the families and to Jub-jub.

  • Tlangi Main says:

    The biggest issue should be the fact that 5teenagers we killed… Celebrity or not, Jub Jub should get wats coming to him… We all are upset but how many of u would say, we shouldn’t judge him if that was ur child, or ur friend? Yes it couldve happened to anyone, but people shouldn’t feel pity cos it was stupid and irresponsible!

  • Ncumisa says:

    I agree we should not judge Khaya. That is not our place. I disagree with something you said: It could not have happened to anyone. This particular accident could only happen to those who choose to race on public roads. Accidents do happen all the time on the roads and they are tragic. This one did not HAVE to happen. Had these people not chosen to race this would not have happened. My heart is aching for the families of those who died and also very sad for those who are injured and their families. I am angry that these lives have been cut short. It is a futile anger, I know, but I am angry all the same. All I can do is ask God to take away my anger and I can pray for the victims and their families. We should all look at ourselves and try to think what we do on the road that could potentially cause harm. Whether it is driving after drinking, talking on the cell phone while driving, texting while driving or occasionally going above the speed limit. We need to look at those bad habits or occasional crimes & decide (and follow through with that decision). None of us wants to be the cause of an easily preventable tragedy. After this tragic event in Soweto I have decided to switch my cell phone off every time I get into the driver’s seat because the temptation to answer it or look at an sms or to send one can be too great.

  • Phily says:

    This is a tragedy ngempela.. My thoughts and go out to the families going through this. We are forever warned about the dangers of alcohol & drug abuse… Funny thing is most people only wake up once a tragedy like this happens to them or someone close to them…

  • Chris Roper says:

    Why on earth can’t we judge? It’s not as if this is a moral issue? There are no grey areas? Two fuckwits break the law recklessly, kill kids – where is there no room to judge? It’s not trial by media, it’s a simple legal issue? Unless, of course, we want to indulge in conspiracy theories and claim none of this happened?

  • Anonymous says:

    Thank you Khaya for reminding us that it could’ve been anyone.
    I’ve been involved in a car crash myself and yes I was highly intoxicated not that I’m proud of , this is a tragic situation that can happen to any young person in SA who enjoys life….so yes let’s all not be too quick to judge Jub Jub as I can only imagine what his going through….
    let’s rather pray for those who have lost loved ones ….some are already planning benefit concerts as if they were waiting for this to happen….our black culture states that we should respect the bereaved !

    • Reggie says:

      Everyone keeps mentioning that Jub Jub must be suffering and “Oh.God, poor man, he will have to live with what he did forever and ever.” Who cares what he is going through. How often do we write how awefull it must be for the serial killer who murdered 16 women or the man who raped a one year old baby. Right now, he is only an idiot who took the life’s of innocent kids. For all of you who say that he should not be judged, if you have kids, put yourself in those parents shoes and see how easy it will be for you to forgive someone who took your child’s life. Imagine the horror those kids experienced as that car came crashing down on them. That should happen to no one! This was not an accident where a tyre burst and someone lost control of their vehicle and we could argue that this was out of their hands. This killing was caused by individuals who willfully consumed alcohol, knowing the dangers, and they went drag racing at a time when the streets were bustling with people coming from work or school. Jub Jub would not be going through despair, he would not be shattered nor devastated if he acted responsibly. And that’s the burden he must carry. Unfortunately, this is only such a big story because a “celebrity” is involved but people are dying on our roads everyday because of irresponsible people like Jub Jub. And please, anyone who says that this is God’s will is confused – God does not kill people. People kill people with their actions. Its a choice made by an individual.

  • Jo Douglas says:

    If it were my child? I have four children, all of whom I love with an intensity I never dreamed possible. Every day, I know that there is a possibility that God’s gift/s to me may be taken away without warning. I will always try to be thankful for the time that I had with them, the time I had to love them. And although initially I would want someone to blame, someone to pay, the stronger and christian part of me knows that no amount of name-calling, or sentencing, will ever bring back my child. Even if the death penalty were an option – how do two deaths make my loss easier to bear?

    Let us remember that Jub Jub has a mother too, a mother who raised him and loves him. Even now.

    It is essential to judge the behaviour, but don’t judge the man. He has made a serious lapse in judgement himself, but I maintain that he will be loathing himself more than any parent possibly could. He must feel shattered, devastated at the results of his actions.

    It is ignorant to think that his celebrity status will see him go unpunished. It is manslaughter at the very minimum, and he will pay the price according to the full extent of the law.

    A sad day – from many different perspectives.

  • Wendy says:

    Very, very sad, reality….on both sides. I agree 100%.
    @ Ncumisa “I disagree with something you said: It could not have happened to anyone. This particular accident could only happen to those who choose to race on public roads.” And those who choose to race on public roads are a big number, trust me this happens every day if not almost so really it could’ve been anyone…….I feel for all the families, they must be very traumatised but Jub is not having it easy as well….Lets pray for him too.

  • @mogotsit says:

    ‘Calling him names now I am not so sure because it could have happened to anyone.’ I totally disagree with you there Khaya (*a rare occurence in itself)

    I’m pretty sure that this could not have happened to someone who is conscious enough of the consequences that are a direct result of their actions. Someone who values life enough not to endanger both his own or others.

    I’ve met and known of Molemo since back in my high school days and to say the least he has always had a careless, arrogant streak to him that is so often displayed by people who have always been treated like celebrities all their lives – not only by the public mind you but also by their own family (i.e. Mama Jackie.) From what I’ve observed from the encounters I had with Molemo all those years ago, is that this boy’s fate was bound to be tragic.

    Ironically, I think that too often, wayward celebrities are cushioned by the whole ‘don’t judge rhetoric’ which only serves to feeding the notion that they are the exception to the rule.

    In fact, I think judging Molemo’s actions means that there’s nothing futile about the way people are reacting to what is a senseless, heartbreaking tragedy.

    (*sorry for the essay, but ja)

  • Tee says:

    Well said Jo Douglas
    Its true people, its not our place to judge!

  • Dplanet says:

    If I understand D.H. Lawrence’s quote correctly, he is arguing that justice (judgement) should be dispensed without succumbing to extreme emotions. He is not arguing that we should not judge in general.

    Dr. Wayne Dyer is a self-help guru so his quote was about finding inner peace by urging people to ‘stop looking for opportunities to take offence’. However, from my understanding, he is talking about petty offences such as “a rude stranger, a fashion miscue, someone cursing, a sneeze, a black cloud…”. He even goes on to say, “If something takes place and you disapprove, by all means state what you feel from your heart.” His quote is not talking about our the righteous outrage we experience when laws are flouted and lives are lost as a result.

    We may all have done things we are not proud of, but drag racing down a busy township street when kids are walking home?… that’s beyond irresponsible.

    The incident was not some unlucky, unavoidable accident where a driver lost concentration for a split second. This was a selfish, anti-social and utterly irresponsible act of reckless stupidity that has taken 5 lives and damaged the lives of countless others. As a parent and a citizen, I do judge this, and thankfully, in this lifetime, so will a court judge.

  • Viwe says:

    I totaly agree with you Kaya, this is a hard situation because when i look at it all the lives of the people involved will change for ever, It has has happened and there is nothing we can do to change it. All we can do is pray and for the families involved including JubJub. it think we should focus on the families, because if we continue bikering on and on condemning JubJub, it will slow down the families grieving process, i feel us focusing on them will make them deal with things easier.It can not be easy, reading news paper head lines,from thousands and thousands of angry people, and having to also deal with the planning of the funeral of your child.

    Yes he did a stupid thing, and acted without thinking, and now he has to pay for that mistake for the rest of his life. I think the guilt he feels in inside is enough and so we should not add on to that, by judging him, because seriously we will lead him to a point where he might see no point of existing and actualy be driven to a point where he deletes himself from life.

    The Lord says, ” do not judge others, and you will not be judged,do not condemn others or it will all comeback unto you, Forgive others and you will be forgiven”. I know this is hard but i think the only way of bettering the situation is by forgiving and praying for the loord to help these families. Also do not forget that the Lord does not do something that was not meant to happen, We are all visitors here on earth and our time will come and when it comes it has come, and it will happen in any way there is nothing you can do about that. The most important thing is to learn from the experience and move on, condemning the person who caused the situation will not help at all.

    I hope everyone understands and does not take this personal, this is what is my opinion on this tragic happening.yes i understand that we all deal withwe all have our various ways of dealing with the situation, and i totaly respect that, so please do not crucify me.

  • LzK says:

    All evidence is circumstantial until it is proven in the court of law, people must just refrain from making unwarranted accusations, we are all equal in the eyes of the law.

  • Siviwe says:

    Hi Khaya
    Thanks for writing this piece. I am grateful as this piece says it all.

  • Lyra says:

    I really feel sorry for the families for their loss,they all in my prayers including Jub Jub.who am i to judge?

  • Dozer says:

    Except for that as a direct result of Jub’s action people died. This was not accident but a selfish utterly irresponsible act of unmeasurable stupidity. All I am saying… if he’s found guilty as things seem to suggest… let him face the full might of the law.

  • Lazzy mokaba says:

    I dnt think jub jub is the only one who shud be blamed becoz it seems like couple of people see jub jub to be blamed.dnt do this to jub jub

    • OLIVIA says:

      the guy is a public figure his freind is not what did he expect? i mean children look up to him he must know wen not to f*ck up, ag man let him just live with it this is one mistake that will change his life foreva trust me it will

  • anonenous says:

    look,I realy dont care about Jub Jub,we lost four lives here and yet people are still telling unnessesary things.yes anyone can do a mistake but not because you were drunk or taken the drugs.These young people were coming back from building their futures but someone with the status just destroy that like this…this is disguisting

  • MissXan says:

    My condolences to the bereaved families. I always believe that God works in misterious ways, and everything happens 4 a reason, God lets live who he wants 2 let live and takes who he wants to take. And yes, who am i to judge coz i couldn’t have saved those children even if i offered my life. I feel deeply sorry n hurt 4 the parents and families of those kids who lost their lives.

    These 2 guys were high and we all knw that taking drugs is like allowing urself to be possessed by sum kind of a demon. Jubjub has been taking drugs for years now and sumhow no1 thot it was a problem coz he was clean and neat and ddnt look like a junky. I always said, every drug user has his breaking point, unfortunately this was his. I doubt he would’v done this in his sober state of mind.
    He is probably sitting there begging 2 be 4given, let us do the most liberating thing, to FORGIVE and hand him over to God. He is still gonna suffer, wit the withdrawel symptoms of a drug addict and the terrible thot and knowledge of wat he has done.
    Kaya, thanx. And to every1 else, those who believe in God, lets ask God to heal and protect our nation . Thanx every1 4 sharing, i thot i was goin out of my mind feeling so down and depressed about wat happened…

  • parms says:

    Jub Jub’s celebrity status aside..this is a reflection of how South Africans generally have no regard for our roads. Everyday I drive to work (on narrow roads mind you) with clear speed limits but everyone seems to think it’s okay for them to go over speed limits. It’s a phenomenon that puzzles me all the time! I’m driving on the fast lane at 100kph because the limit clearly states that but behind me is always an angry driver forcing me aside only to go past at 140kph on a 100kph road!!!It seriously angers me ALL THE TIME!! Don’t even get me started with drinking and driving, it’s become a culture in this country AND WE ALL KNOW FULLY WELL THAT MOST US ARE GUILTY OF THIS, what if one night you driving in your “I’m still fine to drive, I’ve only had 4 beers” and you kill someone, how is that different to what happened here! Guys seriously let’s wake up and realise the dangers of roads and the importance of obeying road laws, FOR ALL OUR SAFETY!
    My prayers go to the families!

  • mtm says:

    I wonder if you would have the same thought Khaya if those were your kids…..but am sure Jub Jub is regretiing where ever he is its not a nice place to be, and for those kids a life cut too soon…..”Dont do drugs Dont Drink and Drive” Am not judging, just an advice……oooh and dont let fame get to your head

  • nana says:

    thank you for this side, jubjub is in so much pain right now, and i think he wishe he was dead. so please

  • Emil says:

    There is no sympathy here for Jub Jub and Thsabalala. It seems the courts also has none – no bail. There is nothing to judge – there are only innocent, dead kids.

  • dosh says:

    I just don’t even want to imagine how it is to be in Jub-Jub’s shoes right now, but even worse, I do not want to be in the shoes of parents,families, friends, fellow learners, neiboughers, teachers and many close people to those kids, I just cannot imagine being hit by a speeding car and dying instantly, its already sad seating where I am sitting right now to know such thing happen on our roads and innocent lives were lost, to know I occassionaly go to a party at a friend’s house, drink a few beers and drive back home, anything can happen at that given time, but I also find drag racing so 1980s, those who grew up in Soweto will remember Tebza Murembula and spinning cars, drag racing, and how we felt unsafe around him, it is so out of fashion is not even funny, and we should be civil enough to understand that safety on our roads come first, I think right now South Africans are angry at Jub Jub given his status in the society, he is suppose to be a role model to the very kids he is alledged to have killed, they buy his music and admired him, they dress like him, I think once you regard yourself a “celebrity” live accordingly, I am not judging Jub, but I am saying he should have known better, even worse, he lives in Basonia, where is the neighbourhood of rich, famous and mostly white, I doubt he ever drag raced in Basonia, because he has to potray that “descent celebrity life style” of Valpre bottled water, but Soweto people may or any other township are not worthy for the same respect he potrays in the white surbubs because they are not rich and famous, or white for that matter. And most sadly, this shows how much our society is riddled with narcotics, on a Monday nje nogal, you are so high on cocaine, c’mon people, we have to do something, and these “celebs” must take a lead, Ga se mo States Mo! Anyway, you are right Khaya to comment that who are we to judge, especially u Sbu YFM, we still know what happened with the Audi TT. Let us all pray for our country, its youth, people and safety on our roads. Kea Leboha.

  • Mpumi says:

    Its interesting how quick people r 2 quote da bible when dey r indirectly faced with da situation… People hav accepted gays yet da bible states no man should lie down with anada man,,people cheat on deir partners yet da bible says we should not stray,,people get drunk all da tym n take joy @ dat 4dat matter yet da bible says drink but dont get drunk, goodness we do so many things 2day dat da bible is against n we dont feel any remourse.what we r feeling right now is anger n by golly how can we not judge

  • Mpumi says:

    …Its merely an involuntary reaction 2 a situation dat could hav been avoided had da guys neva taken drugs n chanllenged each ada as 2 who’s mini is da fastest (notice i never mentioned anybody’s name?).Lets assume it was just an ordinary person n not Jubjub- how else do u think people would hav reacted? Calm n civil? I doubt it people wud hav reacted in da same rage n frustration n judgemental manner,it happens all da tym,lets not pin dis down 2 da fact dat people’s reactions r fuelled by Jubjub’s status

  • zee says:

    if only jub jub was responsible and obeyed the law this would not have happened, he should pay for what he did, but let us not act as if he is the only one who did this, also judge tshabalala

  • vuyo says:

    Jub Jub should be looked up and throw awey the key””””’

  • Shoumiera says:

    This is so sad but as we well know that death is part of out fate which God has put out for us. We were meant to be born on a specific day and our deaths are pre-destined by God by the time we are born. It just hurt so much cos I am also a parent and feel for those who lost their babies even though they are grown up. As for Jub Jub he has to suffer the consequences of his actions cos he had a choice not to take the drugs and alcohol and not to drag in a public area.

  • very sad, we all make mistakes, its no use pointing fingers now. God has a reason…

  • BT says:

    I disagree with everyone who says it could have happened to anyone, NO! That is not true. They were irresponsible and not everyone is! Death can happen to anyone, but drag racing wont happen if you don’t don’t engage in such… more so in such an area. I am of the opinion that you reep what u sow. It was plain dumb and irresponsible to drag race in the heart of soweto. Pity innocent lives had to be lost so everyone gets to understand why it is.

  • zodwa ndlovu says:

    what has happened is very sad
    and disturbing,just thinking
    about the families who have
    lost their loved ones.I think
    whats more important is that
    we pray for them that they
    remain strong and find it in
    their hearts to forgive those
    at fault in order for them to
    to be able to move foward.And
    as for jub jub andf his friend
    I hope that they realise the
    amount of pain they have
    caused all the families that
    are involved,but judgement
    is for the court not us.

  • rave says:

    wat pple shud understand is its not like JUB JUB wok up in the mornig and was like today im going to kill four five children on the road as if he planned it…. but l ges he was sayin tuday im goin tu be enjoying myself with my frend drag racig this only shows that he had done it so many times before that he thot well nothing can go rong as olwes and like any human being we frget rules:wat we told not tu du we du;wat we know is rong we still du…. well he was rong because that day he killed lives and he took away young children hu culd hev turned this world around had they lived l dont know wat the parents who lost thier loved ones are going thru but l have recently lost some people l love its so hard and l pray they get well but we have tu try tu heal and get better and blaming someone is part of our human nature and this time around they have evry rite tu do so but l belive God will not kill him for he wants him tu live wtih wat he did for a long tym and that alone is hell on its own justice should be passed but people who were not there when it happened lets not judje for yu dont control life …remember he woke up a singer and now he is just a murderer it could happen tu yu too….

  • Sibu... says:

    You on Point there Bhuti, i wish one day we can all learn not to Judge one another and call each other by nasty names. As much as this hurts but @the end of it all God knew and allowed it to happen so who are we to judge.

  • Yandiswa says:

    Looking @the situation today…I really do not feel sorry for Jub Jub…whteva happens to hIm he ripped wht he sawed…
    To think tht he wud stand there and say his urine was tempered with,who the hell does he think he is Julius???
    Pleading not guilty is a story of another day…remorse would have been highly appreciated…I remember him posing and smiling with his then girlfriend and son…I was disgusted,he should hv been sorry for wht he did instead his life went frm Bad to Worse…I hope he gets what he deserves not because he is Jub jub but because he killed and damaged people’s lives.
    Iam a parent iam putting myself in those mother’s shoes…He

  • lefenzoo says:

    If Jub Jub was sencere about what happened he would not lie in court.. He said today in court that he never used cocain he only saw it on tv, I qoute… so now why did Kelly say the used to get high together? and that Jub Jub introduced drugs to her? The fact that Jub Jub can lie in court under oath shows that he does not care about anybody but himself… I feel like the author of this blog is trying to shift the focus from Jub Jub to the griefing families… Jub Jub needs to pay for his mistakes we all do, he is not special… and the fact that he lies in court makes me more angry… My condolences to the families of the deceased… If those were my kids Jub Jub was never going to be alive today…

  • rethabile says:

    well written, i totally agree with you who r we to judge,however it dsnt justify the accident…nw its up to the court to decide his fate

  • Talita says:

    I forgave Jub Jub and his friend immediately after the shock. Ave kubuhlungu ukuba sengozini yemoto usinde while others are dead; you always regret you couldn’t save them. Andithethi ke when you are the reason; yet you survive. I’m sure at some point they too wished they died that day. I pray for the affected families every time when I see Jub Jub on TV attending court; I can’t imagine what they are going through!

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